1 Cor 13:4-8 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.Love never fails.

So interestingly enough, I have discovered just how real it is that whenever I reach a wide open peak with God, there is always an attacker waiting right underneath me. Just as sure as I am that God is faithful to overcome on my behalf, the enemy is faithful in his attempt to bring me back down to the valley. To fight for my joy, my peace and my faith. The enemy wants me to feel betrayed by God, he wants me to doubt God. He wants me give in and behave like him.

I am on a high mountain top right now with the Lord. Me and Jesus! And I am praising with my arms wide open. I am rejoicing so much so that I cannot stop shouting praises to Him my Faithful!
And my heart and my spirit were shouting praises on the rooftop when SMACK! There it comes! The enemy with his full army behind him attacking me with that doubt card. Doubt about my true intentions, doubt about my position as a single woman, doubt about my ability to maintain my relationships in the midst of a major life changing trial. All of these things came full force at me marinated in with a few lies and some spicy deceit. Deceit about my character none the less! And all this came at me through one fleshly person.
So I stop and see it for what it is. I am not in need of a defense or a plan of attack. I am in need of prayer to make me stronger so that I can stand against the wiles of the devil. So that I can stand boldly in the truth of the situation without a word. Hours turned into days and my mind and conscience are clear. I am quiet, slow to speak and maintain my position until God says to move. Until this morning that is... when something very strong caught a hold of my heart. The Holy Spirit perhaps?  I believe it was.

I went to bed last night reading a tiny pamphlet of a book called Love the Secret to Your Success. Well, I thought, I could use some more advice on love right now in the midst of my attempts to show my husband the Love of Christ. So I began to read and read and suddenly this amazing scripture that I have read a dozen times and heard over the course of my 35 years at every wedding ever attended became alive to me!

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails!

Never fails? Never? That means that no matter who we encounter, if we are seeking Christ like love, we need never fail in our love towards that person. We need always protect and keep no record of wrongs! This has impacted me in such a mighty way because I realized that it is not just my family or those I choose to love (you know, the ones who are so easy to love) who I should let love rule over, its is all people in all ways, always! This is Christ centered living. Confessing that we are the love of God. We display this in obedience to show love. To obey love.
So upon awaking this morning, I sat on my couch and did not immediately pray. Instead I thought about this unresolved issue and how I was so free from it and detached from it. But them something stirred around me like an echo in a deep valley, but the echo was not my own  it was that of doubt and pride. Are you sure your detached? Do you really want to forget the things that were done to you? Don't you think you deserve the right to clear your name? Don't you think God would want you to stand up for yourself and fight for whats right? Anger kicked in now, Doesn't it seem a little shady what these people are doing to you. Your intentions were pure so you have every rights to expose the lies and the attacks! By this time I am in a complete disillusioned state of mind, being deceived even if just for a moment into thinking that I deserve some sort of justice! And then I look up from my couch and above my door it reads As for me and my house we will serve the Lord. And that was it..all my thoughts disappeared and the love came to mind instantly. Then conviction set in. I had thought for several days now that I was in the right fully. I had not done anything wrong after all and my motives in the situation in which I was being attacked were pure, God knew it, I knew it and soon I thought, everyone else will know it!

Then His voice, His gentle loving Voice of Truth Did you pray for this person this week? Did you meditate on love and scripture? On 1Cor 13:5 that says Love does not keep record of wrongdoings? Did you display the faith that walking in love requires? Did you come to me with unselfish desires for resolution?


For 4 days my prayers regarding this issue, this conflict were still self seeking! Even in my desire to give this to God, I truly did not see it for what it was. This was a way for me to show the Love of Christ to the world. To my accuser, to those around me who know the situation and to God. For His Glory. I don't need to run into a cave and pray for protection ! Ive got the Spirit of God Himself living inside of me! I am protected!

What I need to do is get on my knees and plead with God to have mercy on my enemies, my accusers. To have long suffering with them so that they may have the time to learn and understand the error of their ways. I should have prayed for peace in their hearts, security in their soul so that they no longer feel inadequate or useless. I should pray that the same Spirit that dwells in me do a mighty work in them! For this is the prayer of the righteous! This is the prayer that God can step into on my behalf and heal. This is believing in love. Walking in love by faith in the Word. Walking in the Spirit . This is agape love. The love of Christ in our deepest quietest moments with Him, unfailing love, in honor and thanksgiving of His unfailing love towards us.